I recently heard James Dobson on the radio and he was talking about raising a strong-willed child. Sometimes I wonder what life would be like without strong-willed children of my own. Probably boring...but I would probably get more sleep.
Anyway, he said that strong-willed children are like the night watchman who continuously checks the doorknobs. He wants the doors to be locked but sometimes, he finds one that isn't. That hit me hard. My 8 year old has been checking doorknobs since before he knew what a doorknob was. I know that this constant check of the rules and boundaries in his world provides him sense of security that my other kids never seem to question. After hearing this from Dr. Dobson, I felt better knowing that I am not alone and this is not a unique phenomena. But it also gave me a visual picture that helped increase my understanding of my child. And I am trying to use that new understanding as I try to train and teach him in a manner that is less frustrating and more productive for both of us.
Later that same day, as I was driving to work and beginning to shift gears, that quote continued to float around in my brain. I thought it applied to my patients with borderline and antisocial personality disorders. The line between my life at home and my life at work had once again been crossed. However, the analogy has worked and it has helped me explain the particular behaviors these patients exhibit to other staff members, and perhaps why these particular patients get on our nerves so quickly.
So, this quote, heard in 3 minutes on the radio on a seemingly random day, has impacted me in such a profound way that I have reached a better level of understanding at home dealing with a child with ADHD and at work with my mentally ill patients. Perhaps it was not such a random event but a way that the Lord used to help me understand some of the complicated areas in my life.
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