Sick Days

Mom, RN was “on duty” today. BB started off his day by telling me that he was not feeling well and that he had “thrown up during the night”. I was immediately suspicious because usually, if a child throws up during the night, they don’t completely make it to the bathroom, nor do they have the wherewithal to flush AND clean up any trace of “forensic evidence”.

Well, son, what are your symptoms? What is bothering you?

I get the vague response, “I just don’t feel good.” So, I check for a fever. Nope. I check for changes in skin pallor. Nope…looks pink and perky. I check for signs of diaphoresis (cold sweats). Nope…skin is dry and warm. Mom, RN’s assessment is that he is well enough to go to school.

Kiddo, you are going to have to tough it out and go anyway.

“Can’t you stay home with me?”

Nope. Mom is out of sick leave. I used it all up when we had strep.

“How about Grandma?”

Nope. Grandma has to work. There are no other options.

“How about Grandpa?”

Nope. Tough it out, buddy. Sometimes, grown-ups have to do that too. We have to go to work when we don’t feel well and rest when we get home.

His last attempt to persuade me was the funniest: “But Mom, I don’t want to spread my germs to the other people.”

If you don’t have a fever, you are not contagious. And you are not spreading any more germs than you usually do.

Pretty soon, he quit trying to convince me. I was waiting for more fake symptoms to appear like dry heaves or a forced coughing fit. But he did none of that. Instead, he sat up and started playing with his lego’s and asked for a pop tart and a glass of milk.

I know what it is like to feel uncomfortable in school because things aren’t going well for some reason. And I was sick a lot when I was in 7th grade. Most of it was legitimate. I had strep throat and then a recurrence of strep. I also got the flu. But there were a lot of my sick days that were vague illnesses with symptoms like “my tummy just hurts”, “my head is throbbing”, and “I don’t know what’s wrong, but I just don’t feel well.” You can’t fool the fooler. I don’t want him to learn that he can avoid his problems like I tried to do. And avoidance only made things worse for me. I missed so much school that I fell behind in all my classes and never really caught up. I didn’t develop any good friendships outside of my group of misfits. We called ourselves “The 4 T’s” because all of our names started with T. And for one reason or another, none of us fit in with anyone else but each other.

I fear that BB could fall into the same trap. This is where I figure I need to be firm in my “too sick for school” criteria; Fever, chills, vomit, excessive and debilitating diarrhea or a doctor diagnosed contagion, recovering from surgery and possibly broken bones.

The following things will have to be toughed out:
Headaches (but I will give Ibuprofen)
Stomachaches (with no vomiting)
“I just feel ickies”
I’m too tired

But on true sick days, I do offer as much TLC as I can give. I will bring you Sprite or Ginger Ale. You can call me or text me when you feel lonely. I will set up your sick bed on the couch with your favorite pillow and soft, warm blankets. I may or may not stay home, depending on your age. But I will also do what is best for you in regards to your illness which may mean limited choices in food and beverage, decreased stimulation from the TV or siblings and you may have to take a nap or two.