Resist and Annoy

Last weekend...part 2...Sunday



Stinky attitude has persisted through this past week. I am quite tired of the snotty responses and rudeness I am hearing from the mouth of my 10 year old. However, I have managed to keep my head about me and I am determined to be persistent in my efforts to maintain this control.



Last Sunday, we had a very busy day and while the busyness persisted, the rude attitude was minimal. Once the activity level dissipated, the mouthiness returned. In the evening, I asked the kids to clean the living room. BB was sitting on the couch and rather than helping with the cleaning, was critiquing every one else and what they were or were not doing. This caused a great deal of frustration and Princess was exasperated and announced, "I am tired of being the only one doing any work."



At this point, I conceded that she had a really good point. I then sent the other children upstairs and had a conversation with BB. I informed him that his behavior was not going to be tolerated and he would be cleaning the remainder of the living room by himself.



"Well, that is not going to happen."



At this point, I began to unplug the TV and the playstation and informed him that these items would not be back on until the living room was done.

"I didn't want to watch TV anyway...there's nothing on."

I continued to unplug and find a way to hide cords and thwart possible attempts to reconnect without permission.

"I don't really want to play video games because they are boring..."

I felt my temper beginning to rise and I walked into the garage to put something away and to gather my wits. After a prayer and a few deep breaths I walked back in and then headed upstairs.

By the way, BB, you may not come upstairs until your work is done.

I sat down at my computer and began to work...fine...I was on Facebook (but that is not an addiction I am willing to address at this point). He came up the stairs. I sucked in a deep breath and walked over, calmly (but I was holding back the anger).

BB, I told you that you are not invited to come upstairs with the rest of us until you finish your work. Head back down. I will be more than happy to see you in a while when you finish your job.

I gently urged him back down the stairs and then walked away and went back to my desk. Within a few minutes, I heard some strange noises. I shuddered and figured I was going to find something broken because he was throwing a fit.

But the sound continued and then I recognized it. The vacuum!

I did a victory dance...in my head. If I actually did one, it would have spoiled the effect of MOM in CONTROL. But inside, I was jumping, dancing and whooping for JOY!! However, rather than go downstairs, I waited.

He came up a few minutes later and shyly said, "Hi. I'm done."

I heard the vacuum. Let us go and see your work.

"By 'us', do you mean you?"

No, I mean you and I will go down and see what you have done.

In that moment, I decided that no matter what the living room looked like, this kid needed positive feedback. He had pushed through and had chosen the right thing. When we went down, I pointed out a few things he needed to pick up and then I gushed about what he had done and invited him to join us upstairs.

Something has changed inside me. It's hard work but it is working. To myself, I say "Go Girl! Keep it up!"